Christmas came early this year because yesterday, the latest issue of both US Weekly and InStyle showed up in my mailbox.
Usually I get InStyle on Fridays and US Weekly on Mondays, so this was a serious treat. I thought I was going to have a boring Saturday but, no- fate intervened and injected me with a shot of girly pop culture. Yes! Not only that, but I had stolen an issue of OK! Magazine from the gym on Friday, which I had yet to peruse. Awesome!
I eagerly grabbed the magazines and raced into the house, clutching them to my breast like they were small children.
I was quickly in the middle of US Weekly, (mostly because it only takes me 12 minutes to read the entire thing cover to cover and, damn, Kate Bosworth looks SPECTACULAR in that leather skirt), about to devour OK! when I got a text from one of my coworkers: Eclipse trailer released– have u seen it?
What! How did I miss this? I considered myself a bit of a connoisseur of Twilight gossip, and I missed the trailer release of Twilight’s 3rd installment, Eclipse?! Fuck! Dropping US Weekly, I raced to the computer, got on my favorite gossip site (and when I say ‘favorite’ I mean one of the dozen I stalk) and watched the trailer on EW.com. As always, Robert Pattison looked like a gorgeous powdered donut and Taylor Lautner a well-built stunner that would make me commit statutory rape without a second thought. I would do jail time for just ten minutes with you, Taylor. JAIL TIME.
I had finished watching the trailer and was on to downloading Lady Gaga newest music video ‘Telephone’ (LOVE her!) when my own cell phone rang.
It was my sister- “There’s a Keeping Up with the Kardashians marathon on right now,” she said.
AAHH!! I love the Kardashian family, mostly because I think the mom on the show, Kris, is hilarious. I dropped the phone, leaving both my sister and Lady Gaga hanging, and raced to the television where I slipped on the InStyle that was on the floor and ate shit into the coffee table. As I was falling, I pictured the headline in the paper: DENVER WOMAN KILLED BY POP CULTURE.
Luckily, my super-squishy couch caught my fall. Panting, I up righted myself and reached for the remote, my attention now focused the Kardashian sisters. Phew, I’m glad I wasn’t hurt- I mean, I haven’t read InStyle’s article on spring’s must-have accessories.
Quarter Life Whatever
3 years ago